Archive for the Fiction Category

The Shuffle

Posted in Fiction with tags , , on August 1, 2010 by richardblandford


A while back, I wrote a lot of short stories. At first, I was writing them simply to experiment with voices, styles and genres, and see how far I could push myself. After I’d come up with a few, however, it became clear that something bigger was emerging. The stories began to link thematically, and together became a body of work called The Shuffle.

In The Shuffle, connections are made only to fall apart. Order and randomness fight it out for control. The supernatural rubs up against the banal. Some stories are as meticulous as I can make them, while others are left deliberately loose. One’s nearly as long as a short story can be. Another is just one paragraph. It’s a patchwork quilt, as stitched together by a colour-blind lunatic who may or may not have gotten hold of some dangerous hallucinogens.

This summer, I am presenting short stories from The Shuffle on this blog. There’s a catch, however. Once a story has been up for a week, it gets deleted and replaced by the next one.  This is partly so my blog doesn’t get clogged up with short stories, but also hopefully to lend a sense of occasion and urgency to it all.

Why not print out and keep them in a ring-bind folder?


Help Me With My Evil Plan

Posted in Books, Fiction with tags , , on April 9, 2010 by richardblandford

The other week, presumably in an effort to clear the floor dedicated to housing unsold copies of my books at their Pimlico headquarters, Random House sent me yet another box of the trade paperback edition of my first novel, Hound Dog.

I’m not sure what to do with them. I’ve already got one box in the cellar, and there are only so many copies I can try to force through hamster-resembling Liberal Democrat MP Sarah Teather’s window. I’m beginning to think she’s not interested. Even though I thoughtfully inscribe each one ‘We Shood B 2Getha’ in my own blood. I mean, what’s a guy got to do these days??!!

Anyway, what I’m going to do with the books (Sarah Teather issue is unresolved) is this. If you email me your address, I will send you a SIGNED copy. If you have not read it already, you have my permission to do so. Then, however, you must redistribute in an interesting manner. But here’s the thing. I want photographic evidence of its re-homing, which I can post here on the blog.

For instance, if you were to give it to The Really Wild Show’s Terry Nutkins, it’s not enough to say, ‘Oh, I gave it to Terry Nutkins’. You have to send a photograph of the book being placed in Terry Nutkins’s hand. Whether or not Terry Nutkins is chained up naked in your spare room when this occurs is entirely up to you.

So, just to reiterate: Step 1. Email me. Step 2. Receive book. Step 3. Read book (optional). Step 4. Re-home book AND photographically document this happening. Step 5. Email me photograph, in full knowledge that I’ll piss all over your copyright and reproduce it here.

Well, what are you waiting for? Hop to it, before they send me another box!

Love Hotel City

Posted in Books, Fiction with tags , , , , on March 31, 2009 by richardblandford

I have a short story, ‘The Koshino Animation Company of Japan’, featured in the new Tokyo-themed 3AM anthology, Love Hotel City, out April 1st.  It’s edited by Andrew Stevens, and also features contributions from Stephen Barber, Paul Ewen, Steve Finbow, Michael Gardiner, Ken Hollings, Richard Marshall, Ben Myers, John-Ivan Palmer, Lee Rourke, Kenji Siratori and Steven Wells.  

Apparently I’m one of the UK’s ‘most subversive authors’.  I’m not sure what they mean by that.  I hope it’s a compliment, and they don’t think I fiddle with kids or anything.